I Can’t Wait For The ‘Fresh Air’ Promised By The President This Year–By Segun Dada

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In what seemed like forever, 366 days just breezed past and we have heralded a new year, 2013. Finally, 2013 is here. We waited, endured and prayed. Thank heavens it is here now.
What is special about 2013? As promised by President Goodluck Jonathan, in 2013, we will start enjoying the fresh air from his clichéd transformation agenda. In 2013, our President has promised that he would be known as “the world’s most praised president.” Our president has promised to shut the mouths of people like me who take delight in criticizing his government. Just like always, “Our President Has Promised.”
Here’s an excerpt from a piece I wrote last year and which still guides my expectations concerning this administration:
Contrary to popular opinion, I can’t wait to start praising President GEJ. When bombs no longer ravage the homes of my brothers and sisters in Yobe and Borno states and blood no longer flows in our land like ‘sapele water’, I will praise the president. When we are no longer in pitch darkness, I will praise GEJ to high heavens. When our hospitals are no longer mortuaries in disguise and patients need not run about to look for prescribed drugs from private pharmacies, I will sing the president’s praises.
When our roads are no longer catalysts for sending hundreds of lives to the great beyond daily, I will roll on the ground with praise of the president on my lips. When the foul-smelling and suffocating odour of corruption is cleansed from our nation, with the known criminals in the president’s cabinet going to jail and refunding their loots, I will not only praise the president, I will kill a white ‘he-goat’ in his honour. When we get the fresh air we were promised during his elections, I will get a tattoo inscribed with the words: “I love my President Jonathan” on my dark glistening forehead.
Mr President must understand that like him, we also looked forward to the year 2013. We look forward to whatever magic he has in store to make all of our problems go away. For 2012 must never repeat itself in our history. And I mean, NEVER!
Using this medium to wish my Readers a Happy and prosperous new year. If there is no you, there won’t be me. Have a wonderful 2013.
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